TMNT Changes
by Sampsonknight
Summary: This is a Raph x OC story. This story is based on overide2008 (on DA) - OC Sasha who is 18, whom has been mutated into a turtle and trying to coup with her new look and life, while Raph who is 20, is trying his best to help her, but has no clue in doing so, while he tires his best to figure out a way to cheer her up.
1. Chapter 1

**TMNT: Changes **

**An OC x Raph Fan Fic**

**Part 1 of 2**

* * *

(Sasha POV)

Hot steam filled the room clouding her vision, she didn't mind though, in a way she didn't want to see anyways, as she stared within it, while warm water, a bit hot for her taste beat down her neck, flowing across her small figure.

Water running down her shell, which part of her wanted to have it against her skin instead, so she could at least feel it, some ran down her arms, then over her curves, finally ending up onto the floor flowing through the cracks between the cement floor, towards the drain.

Sasha watched the water, as the steam continued to build, breathing slowly through her mouth, she focused on the water and how it felt against her body.

(One…)

Leaning back looking towards the ceiling, she let the water splash her eyes as they stung, still not caring she closed them letting the running water try to penetrate her eyes lids.

(Two…)

She took note of everything, she noticed how the water felt on her green skin, how her fingers felt when she flinch them hard making a fist then letting go, three fingers how odd of a sensation.

(Three…)

Licking the water that ran down her beak towards her mouth, she caught the drops tasting them, even this was different.

(Four…)

Crossing her legs, she focused on how they felt, the way her skin rubbed together, then with her hand, she trailed it across her plastron it was thick, hard, yet oddly flexible.

The only feeling she had was what her hand felt nothing more, which sadden her, moving up towards her round breast she wanted to feel her hand against them, yet couldn't feel nothing than the plastron itself, ending at the top between the plastron and skin she felt the edge smooth to the touch.

(FIVE!)

Forcing her hands to her sides tilting her head up, not too much to get a mouth full of water, she let it all out, a horrific scream with all the air that was in her lungs, she wanted the steam to absorb her pain, her anger, her frustration.

Sasha wanted the water to wash away, her fear, her doubts, her insecurity.

Not stopping she continued her scream, as her face turned red, her lungs started to burn and her mouth dried, finally, when she couldn't do it any longer, she ended her wailing, collapsing forward gasping for air.

The mist in the room dried her throat, making her cough and wheeze, desperately Sasha tried to breathe, forcing her head up, she opened her mouth to collect some water to loosen her throat to finally get some breaths in.

She felt drained, letting her body weight taking control finding herself falling backwards onto her shell, Sasha stared at the ceiling, watching the mist circle around, like it was dancing for her, with her hand she led the mist this way and that engulf by its performance.

How odd something so simple as this, was so beautiful in its way, looking at her hand that was a different story, to think she finally has the ability to see, to finally put a visual image with a sound or smell that comes her way…

Yet her price was steep, she lost something in return, her human form, she didn't even know what she use to look like, she was blind before, before this happened, now somehow the mutation made her be able to see…

Sure, she could look at some photos of her formal self, but she refused, for the thought only hurt more, it felt like a tease, 'this was you, now your this...'.

Breathing in and out, she felt her plastron rise and fall, still staring at the ceiling, the water was becoming uncomfortable, sighing she rolled over, picking herself up, turning the hot water off, leaving the cold to balance herself before turning it off as well.

Grabbing a towel that was on a shelf, she dried herself off, then placed around her neck, her ruby red pendent, that hung on a gold chain, a trinket, a memento from her late mother, who she had only a few memories of.

She was young when she passed away, ever since then, she has been living an orphan's life, not an easy one that was for sure, being blind, wasn't kind to her, as others use to pick on her, since she wasn't like them.

Shaking her head, she let go of the pendent letting it fall against her chest, she had other things on her mind; the past was something she needed to put on the side for now.

Dried, she threw the towel into the hamper then put on her long yellow cotton short sleeve vest, which went around her shell, but hang long towards her knees.

The front had three buttons near the breast if she wished to button it up, Mikey made it for her so she didn't feel so naked.

Funny thing, the guys walked around naked per say, yet she felt odd not wearing a thing, habits die hard as she figured it was the reason of her discomfort for not wearing anything.

Leaving it unbutton, Sasha felt secure enough at the moment, later she might button it up if she starts feeling uncomfortable, leaving the shower room through the archway that used a curtain to separate it from the room with the toilets, no one was in sight as she viewed herself in the mirror.

Her skin was a light green, the only thing that was the same, that she has been told was her eye color, a ocean blue, ones that someone could get lost in, that's what she was told yet again.

They were beautiful; the shade of color, the way the light hits them, the only thing from her human form…

Breathing deeply she pushed herself off the sink, that she just realized she was leaning against, heading for the door that lead out of the bathroom.

(I hope no one heard me… Probably not, if they did, someone would have ran in the room…)

Entering the living room, the silence hit her ears, there seemed to be no one around, no silly game music playing in the background, or the local news, not even a whisper.

Facing the empty lair, that felt like it was shrinking, she started to hyperventilate, closing her eyes she counted.

(1...2…3…4…5…6…7…8…9…..10, I'm not alone, they just probably went on patrol, nothing more, I really need some fresh air… but that means I would have to go… up there.)

Reopening her eyes, she looked towards the ceiling, knowing all to well what was above, the city, the noise, the busy streets of cars and the lingering fumes they made.

But she has been in the lair for so long now, truly losing count how long, it felt like forever, she wanted to go and see, she hasn't seen it yet, only sense it with her other senses when she use to wandered around, visiting the guys when she was human.

Holding herself, she wondered if it was a good idea, she was a turtle not a human, what if someone sees her, could she protect herself?

Sure the guys, meanly Raph, has been training her so she could at least protect herself for she felt helpless after she was mutated, it was sad, as she noticed she felt more helpless as a mutant, then when she was blind.

Not caring anymore, as the urge to see first hand her home in a different light, she ran up the stairs to her room, that was once a storage room that guys used, but recently cleaned up for her to use, entering her room she went to her closet first.

Hanging on a hook was a used oversized women's winter jacket that Raph found for her in case she did have to go outside, considering it was the middle of winter.

Her old jacket wouldn't fit over her shell, this one fit over it well, so she can keep her body heat in and conceal herself from prying eyes.

Scrambling through a box on the floor with some clothes that were gathered from April for emergencies for disguises or if she felt she wanted to wear something, she took out the brown pants, putting them on, including a yellow and red stripe winter hat placing it on her head.

Luckily she found some gloves, though it was odd only putting her three fingers through as the two remaining just flopped there, ignoring it, she grabbed the pair of white winter boots, putting them on as well.

She wouldn't win any fashion contest, but with a hood on the coat and the rest on, no one would be able to guess she was a turtle.

Deck out and ready to take on the winter cold, Sasha left the lair from the elevator that led to the garage, stepping into the garage she shivered, as she noticed the temperature dropped immensely.

(I guess Donnie doesn't heat this place…)

Making her way to the door, she braved what was awaiting for her, opening the door, Sasha eyes blinked uncontrollably as the light that cast against the white glistening snow irritating them.

Finally adjusting, Sasha looked about, everything was covered in layers of snow, it was so white she couldn't believe how beautiful it glistened in the light, like thousands of stars.

Thinking about stars, she looked up only to her dismay, she could only see gray clouds covering the sky, a bit disappointed she really wanted to see more than just clouds, to finally see what a real star looks like.

Shutting the door behind her, she figured she could take a small, quick walk, then head back before anyone knew she even have left.

Taking a step, she stopped in her tracks, as she felt uneasy, realizing she had no clue where she was or where to go from here.

Yes in the past, she did take a route that brought her here to see the guys, but she used a walking stick to guide her, she never walked around without it, the concept was still new to her, comparing a visual to her old ways, it felt so foreign, so different, that at times it was hard connecting the dots.

(You can do this, its like when you first got used to the lair, feel the area with your foot and hands, focus on the sounds and smells. It's not like anyone is around to see you…)

Taking her own advice she did so, feeling with her foot walking forward, she touched the fence near the sidewalk, recognizing how it felt, she use to take this route she was certain of it.

A bit more confident she smiled, she stopped feeling her surroundings, just letting herself enjoy walking and using her eyes to guide her this time around.

If she was correct, there is a small park not far from here, she could at least take a look at some trees, she wondered how they looked in the winter.

* * *

(Raph POV)

The wind blew, ripping through his coat that he foolishly had wide open; perched onto a roof overlooking in towards an alley, Raph wondered if it was going to be one of those nights.

His brothers already retiring for the night, he wanted to take another look around, sure he wanted to get home badly to see Sasha, to see if the kid was feeling any better, but part of him didn't want to.

Not that he didn't want to see her per say, he didn't know how to face her, he felt bad, he felt it was his fault.

Slamming his fist into the concrete roof, he growled.

(DAMN IT! I should have been there for her… How hard was it to meet her, letting her come to the lair alone at night. What the fuck was I thinking?)

Closing his eyes he wanted to beat his fists into a skull of a purple dragon, didn't matter if that purple dragon wasn't at fault for Sasha mutating all of them were going to feel his fury, for what they put her through.

Sniffing the air, it was stale, old, nothing of interest…

Giving up, Raph straiten up looking around as he placed his hand out, catching a snowflake, noticing its detail, funny how he never gave a damn before, yet ever since Sasha been able to see he started to appreciate the little things he use to over look.

(Maybe this would cheer her up?)

Smiling, he had an idea, if he brought her outside to see the snow fall, it might lighten her mood, it was a long shot, but he had to do something.

He couldn't stand seeing those sad, distant eyes, which will not open up to him anymore, she always was open to him, letting him hear her thoughts and feelings, yet lately she bottling everything up, refusing letting anyone in.

Shaking his head, he wasn't going to let it eat at him, he knew he couldn't force her, but at least he could give her as much support as he can.

Leaping roof to roof, Raph was startled by his shell cell going off, that broke his train of thought, making him lose his footing as he fell backwards hard onto his shell.

Out winded, he laid there on the roof staring at the sky, at least he wasn't jumping over a building and slipped on an edge and fall to his death, or really injuring himself.

It rang annoyingly, finally giving up to its constant beckoning for him to answer, he flipped the lid up.

"WHAT!" he huffed growling through his teeth, then fear caught him as he realized it could be Sasha on the other line.

Feeling like a fool he quickly replied to his rude and abrupt answer, "Sorry, Raph here."

"Well, that is new, you saying sorry," Leo mocked on the other side of the phone.

Narrowing his eyes. Raph should have known, growling again, he sat up slowly, "Shut up! I thought you might have been Sasha, asshole."

"Sure… speaking about Sasha, do you know where she went?" Leo asked with a hint of worry in his voice.

Raph eyes widen, and his throat felt dry, "What do you mean, she is not in the lair!?"

Only silence from Leo answered him, then Raph could hear Donnie and Mikey on the other side talking to Leo, stating they couldn't find her and her winter clothes are not in her room.

The air around Raph became thin, as he feared the worse, where was she, why would she leave the lair, hell where would she go?

"Raph she isn't…." Leo started only to be cut off by Raph, who wasn't in the mood to hear Leo repeat what he already heard.

"Does she have a shell cell?" Raph barked jumping to his feet frantically looking around.

"No, she doesn't, we will start looking around, Raph start heading home, Donnie suggests you taking the route she used to get to the lair. It would be more familiar to her," Leo suggested as Raph could hear his brothers offer to check other places as Leo stated he will stay in the lair in case she returns.

"Fine, Damn it Leo call me if she shows up and don't you dare give her shit for leaving either, ok …" Raph didn't want Leo giving her any lecture or making her feel bad, fearing she might start thinking the lair was some prison, it wasn't, it's just they worried about her… he worried about her.

* * *

(Sasha POV)

Reaching the park, it was breath taking, sure it had more snow, like everywhere else, but the lamps were different than the street lights, they were painted black, crafted with fancy designs of swirls with flowers.

The benches where half covered by snow, some looked like someone brushed the snow away showing their green painted wood with stone sides for support.

The trees, they were bare with no leaves, of course, but had something just as spectacular, on many branches dangled long thick icicles, some branches had short and others thin, none were the same size or shape, it was amazing.

Smiling, she looked within the park debating if she should dare, or should she turn around and head back, how long has she been outside?

Thinking on it, she wasn't sure, she had completely lost track of time.

Sasha stood there as her mind wandered, then she just took a step inwards, a quick look wouldn't' hurt, right?

(Just a peek then I will head back!)

Overeager, she walked forward, quickening her steps as the sights overwhelmed her, taking her wrapping her in its beauty.

(So this is what a winter wonderland looks like.)

She always heard that song many times and visualized what it would be like, now she was seeing it first hand, it was better than she ever imagined it to be.

Giggling to herself, she knelt down, taking some snow rolling it into a ball, then throwing it in the air as she watched it fall to the ground, breaking apart on impact, to rejoin the rest of the snow.

This was fun, this was new, this was something she had to admit she wouldn't have experienced before, when she was human.

Yet she felt a bit lonely, the cold nipped at her beak, figuring it was best she headed home, she started to walk to the entrance of the park.

* * *

(Raph POV)

Raph rushed forward, pushing himself to his limits, if anything happened to her…

Shaking his head, he couldn't believe this was happening.

(Why couldn't she have waited until I got home? Why did she have to go out alone, at night of all times? Damn it, this is my fault for giving her too much space, I must look like I was ignoring her… What if she thinks I don't care about her anymore?)

Doubts filled the red clad turtle's head; he couldn't help it since he couldn't figure any other reason she would leave in these circumstances.

Weaving in and out of the shadows, he became careless, almost losing his footing a couple times and was almost seen by some humans closing their curtains in their windows.

Yet he didn't care, all thoughts were on her.

Suddenly his heart leaped into his throat, as a blood curdling scream came from somewhere to his right, recognizing it, he grind his teeth, it was Sasha and she was in trouble.

Changing his course he headed for the park he knew wasn't too far away and the screams were coming from there.

Leaping down a fire escape, he rushed into the park, making sure he had his coat zipped up and his hoodie down.

At this moment he didn't want to risk someone noticing him for her sake, yet that said, unless they looked at his legs that could still pose a problem, unless it was someone that is stupid enough to think his legs were some odd ski pants he was wearing, which wouldn't be the first time, he hope not to run into anyone on his way to her.

In the distance, Raph could see her, on the ground, trying to scramble to her feet, her face was showing and there in front of her was two men, both had wooden slides in their hands, one had his raised up into the air, ready to strike Sasha.

Then Raph saw it, mortified in it sight, knowing it was hers, blood…

There was some blood on the ski of the sled, they have already hurt her, growling angrily, he lost it all together, taking his sai's out, letting out a roar that startled the two men, he rushed at them in a heat of rage.

Jumping in the air startled by the approaching figure that was coming towards them quickly, the men's faces went white as a ghost backing up.

Sai in hand Raph attacked the guy that was hurting Sasha, his rage was at its limits, losing all control, Raph thrust his sai into the guy's arm, as terrified screams of pain came out of him.

The other guy too afraid to do a thing, drop his sled running for his life, growling fiercely Raph didn't care for his prey was under him and the man was going to pay for laying a finger on Sasha.

Blood soaked through the man's jacket, Raph's eyes narrowed licking his lips, he enjoyed the terror in the pathetic human's face, as the human tried to process what was going on, as the fear of realizing his own life was going to come to an end, the man screamed pleading Raph to let him go and stop hurting him.

"I'm sorry, I'm SORRRY!" the man wailed, tears ran down his face, with another scream Raph removed his sai only to dig it into the guys other arms.

"AHHHHHH, FUCK, I AM SORRY!"

"SORRY? SORRY? You mother fucker you hurt her, why? What did she do to you? NOTHING yet you hurt her! You're going to pay you piece of shit!" Raph roared as his eyes filled with a lust for blood, this was the relief he has been searching for all night.

This was the moment he was going to put all his frustration, all his anger into, he was going to kill this man and he didn't give a damn.

Both sais in hand, he raised them up into the air to bring them down onto the man's chest, he was going the relish this, to see this trash's eyes that were full of fear lose life as he gives out his last breath.

Thrusting down, in the mist of his madness, a voice shattered through his blood lust.

"NO!" Sasha screamed, grabbing Raph's arms to stop him, if he did this he would only kill himself inside, the guilt later would destroy him.

Feeling her pleads smelling her tears, Raph stopped, eyes widen, he started to tremble.

(What… What am I doing? Oh hell I didn't…)

Looking over to his side, he saw her, Sasha's tear soaked face, her eyes were in complete horror, on what he was going to do.

In the corner of her head he could see the blood from the wound the man gave her earlier, then it became apparent, Raph fell back landing on the snowy ground that was crimson with the man's blood.

The man might have hurt her, but in truth his action, his blood lust was hurting her more, he was supposed to protect her, shield her from harm, yet in the end he was the one that truly harm her in ways he promise never to do to her.

(What have I done…)

"I… Sasha... I…" getting to his feet Raph looked away in shame, what can he say to make it up to her, how could he rewrite his actions?

"I want to go home," Sasha sniffed, looking away, she couldn't stand looking at the man on the ground that was bleeding to death; she didn't want to think about it, she just wanted her warm bed nothing more.

"Yeah, sure…" Raph grabbed his shell cell dialing 911, "Yeah, I need an ambulance at Amber Park, there is a man that looks like he is bleeding to death," Raph informed the woman on duty, then hung up before she asked any more questions.

Wiping the blood off his sai, Raph put them away, walking past Sasha, "He will be fine, we best be going before anyone comes."

Not saying a word Sasha just followed the red clad turtle; neither knew what to say to each other, for both felt at fault for this situation.

* * *

(Sasha POV)

The room was covered in partial darkness, for she only had her lamp on her nightstand, on.

Lying there she stared at the walls, it's been a couple days since the incident at the park, she hasn't really talked to Raph since, she feared to say the wrong things, and in truth, how he acted did scare her.

Not that she was really scared of him, no, it was the fact that he lost control and almost destroyed himself because of her, she should have went home, not quench her curiosity, she should have known better.

(That is the million dollar answer, I should have known better for everything…)

Closing her eyes, she tried to hold her tears back, everything inside was falling apart, she didn't know where she stood anymore, she didn't know what to do anymore.

The worse, the one person she trusted more than anything, she couldn't talk to him, for she feared what he would think, what it would make him feel, what if she hurts him, she wasn't dumb, she knew Raph blamed himself for what happened to her.

Slumping down into her bed, she sighed, maybe she should get some sleep, it was late and tomorrow was another day.

Getting comfortable, a knock on her door caught her ears as she looked over towards it in wonder, who would be knocking on her door this late at night?

"… Sasha are you awake?" Raph voice whispered on the other side of the door, he sounded nervous.

"Yeah."

Silence fell as she watched the door, then finally Raph peeked his head in, "May I come in?"

With a nod, he took that as an ok, opening the door wide, he entered her room, closing the door behind him.

He didn't make eye contact with her, shuffling his feet uneasy, "I… I want to apologize for my behavior at the park, and the past couple days… I didn't mean to make you feel like I was ignoring you… I..."

Breathing deeply Sasha tried her best to smile, it wasn't easy, "It's ok Raph, I know you weren't ignoring me…"

(If you were, I don't blame you.)

Biting his lip, Raph took a breath, "Sasha grab your winter gear and meet me in the garage."

Surprised at the sudden change of topic, Sasha looked at him, why would he want her to grab her stuff, and this late at night?

Raph watched her response trying to read her, calming down, pushing his nervous state aside, he presented himself more confidently, "Please just do it ok, I will be in the garage, you don't have to wear any pants unless you want to, but please bring a pair along," he told her leaving the room before she could even attempt to question him.

Alone in the room, she was dumbfounded, what was going on, the way he was acting was weird even for him, realizing the only way she was going to find out what he was up to, she had to comply doing what he asked.

Putting on her winter gear other then her pants, she turned her light off, leaving the room, not before glancing over towards the clock that stated it was 11 o'clock.

Shaking her head, she didn't know what to suspect, as she made her way through the lair towards the elevator that would bring her to the garage, the lair was quite and there wasn't a soul in sight, where was everyone?

Reaching the garage, she found the garage door wide open and one of the cars running, with Raph in the driver's seat sitting back, waiting for her.

She still couldn't see anyone, why was the car on and where was Raph planning to bring her?

Sasha made her way to the car, opening up the passenger's door, peeking her head in, looking at Raph with wondering eyes.

"Come on, don't let all the heat out, get in," Raph told her tapping his finger on the steering wheel.

Getting in she put her seat belt on, but not before throwing her winter gear into the back seat.

Settled, Raph drove out of the garage, looking a bit pleased with himself.

Curiosity taking over her, Sasha had to know, "Where are we going?"

With a devilish smile, Raph beamed, "You'll see."


	2. Chapter 2

**TMNT: Changes **

**An OC x Raph Fan Fic**

**Part 2 of 3**

* * *

(Raph POV)

One hand on the wheel, with his other hand, channeling the radio stations for something decent to listen to, Raph watched Sasha in the corner of his eye, amused at the notion of her obvious expression on her face, which reflected in the window she was staring out of.

The wonder within her eyes, the curiosity that consumed her, she did not have the faintest idea where he was bringing her and he loved it.

The best part was when they exited the city, her eyes widen, at the sight she has never seen before, Raph in many ways wanted to laugh, he never seen someone so excited to see the countryside, well except for Mikey, but that's just Mikey.

The only sounds that could be heard in the car was the radio, Raph figuring it was more fun just being silent, he warn a smile watching the road, driving a bit below the speed limit, being winter and the dead of night he didn't want to risk it with her in the car.

All he needed to ruin this moment, this trip, was hitting some black ice, or some misfortunate animal that decided to cross the road, also he didn't want the scenery to pass by to fast for her.

The moon was high casting its illuminating glow down, sure Raph knew Sasha must have gained the same night vision he currently had, he wondered if she knew that, she never could see before so how could she compare it to humans?

She must have noticed the difference seeing with light and no light, at least, in the dark the details are there, but the color isn't, it was like a bluish gray, which was the only way he could describe it.

Relaxing in his seat, he watched the road, thinking on his plan of action, watching a car go by his smile deepened as he knew who it was, yet he didn't say a word.

He was pleased to see that she didn't recognize who was in the other car or even noticed the car had passed by at all.

(Good she didn't notice them, this is working out great!)

A yawn came from Sasha as she rubbed her eyes, Raph figured she would start to fall asleep, considering they have been driving for an hour now and there was still at least two more hours to go.

Lowering the volume of the station, Raph waited, Sasha's head bobbed a bit, trying desperately to stay awake, she shifted in her seat yawning again.

Finally giving in, she fell fast asleep leaning her head against the window, Raph knew it was a matter of time she would give into her tired state, she needed the rest anyways, especially what he had in store for her tomorrow.

Being used to being up late, he wasn't worried not getting enough sleep, smiling again, he pushed the negative thoughts that clouded his mind, he feared this wouldn't make up for what he did with that man in the park.

Shaking his head, he couldn't let that drag him down.

(She's beautiful… She is really cute when she is sleeping…)

* * *

(Sasha POV)

Sweet dreams filled her head, feeling something soft under her hands, she didn't recognize it as she slowly opened her eyes, the room was dark and she didn't know where she was.

Viewing towards her hand, she came aware she was laying on a bed that had soft clean smelling sheets, silk maybe?

Spread on top of her was this equally soft, heavy quilt that had the scent of spring flowers.

Feeling the bed carefully, it was warm, she has been lying there for some time, viewing her surroundings she seemed to be in a bedroom?

Feeling a bit nervous that she was alone, she relaxed when a familiar snoring emerged from the corner of the room.

Over in the corner, what appeared to be a small sofa, sprawled out, head back mouth fully open, Raph slept with one leg over the top of the sofa, she wondered how he could sleep in that position?

To her surprise, he wasn't wearing anything, no gear, not even his bandana, all laid on the ground near by, tilting her head she had to admit this was the first time she has ever seen him without his bandana on.

Sure, she has been around him before when he had it off, but she was still human at the time, the first time was when she finally opened up to him telling him her past, in result to show her his trust in her, he took his bandana off allowing her to feel his face without it on.

Blushing, that memory still burned in her head, she was the only one he would give such privilege to, that day she felt special, and knew without a shadow of a doubt she had feelings for him, and believed he felt the same towards her, she hope that is.

But now she wasn't sure anymore how he felt for her, confused, she didn't know anymore what reside within herself or him, what was his real thoughts of her when he look upon her?

She wasn't good at reading faces and his face and voice seemed to never add up, making her confusion deepened.

Patting her cheeks to refocus on the matter at hand, she sighed.

(How long have I been sleeping?)

Noticing the alarm clock on the night stand, it read 6 a.m., she has been out for some time, examining the room more to see if it held any clues on where she might be, she sat there, the room wasn't big, it had wooden walls and the furniture looked a bit old.

Still not sure where she was, she got out of the bed, with a shiver she noticed it was a bit cold, viewing back to Raph, he didn't have any blankets on, taking the quilt she brought it to him placing it on top of him, he stirred then moaned shifting his position.

Sasha nervously touch his face, it was cold.

(How long has he been sleeping there without a blanket on?)

Shaking her head, she smiled, Raph can be quite silly at times, staring at the calm, cute face, she blushed, she could get lost in that face, the features, his chin, his beak, his irresistible lips…

So much she wanted to kiss them, to touch them again with her fingers, she remember the first time she felt them, as memory served her, she recalled Raph's face heating up, when she ran her finger across those lips, she didn't mean too at the time, she was feeling his face to see it in her mind.

Blushing again, she closed her eyes, she knew she couldn't, it would be wrong of her to take such action towards him, when he was asleep, rubbing her arms, she was still feeling a bit cold, wishing she had brought a sweater with her at least.

If she had known that he was bringing her somewhere cold, she would have brought a few more things.

It would have been nice if Raph had given her some kind of hint or at least told her to bring something other then her winter gear, wondering what happen to the winter clothing she was wearing, she viewed around the room more, realizing they weren't in the room, yet what was, did catch her by surprise.

There, on top of the dresser that had a big round mirror attached to it, was a suitcase, unzipping it, she looked inside, her other clothes were in it, that was in her room.

Not only that there was a new item, a nice looking yellow sweater that fit around her shell, attached to it was a hood.

It seemed it was made by Mikey, when did he made this for her, taking it out she took her vest off replacing it with the chilly sweater that warmed up fairly quickly, smelling it, it had the same flowery scent the blankets had, and the material was soft and comfy, she loved it.

Hugging herself it was sooo soft, she couldn't help smiling, closing her eyes, enjoying the scent, the moment finally fading away, replaced by a curiosity that took root, growing within her, she decided she will take a peak out the window, maybe it will give her some clues.

She could leave the room, but without Raph she wasn't that brave, opening the curtain the site was lovely.

Before her, she could see a field of snow leading towards a forest of trees, where did Raph take her to?

It was still dark, as she could finally see the star, eyes widened a tear fell from her eye, they were so beautiful, she never thought they would really look like diamonds in the sky, like the old 'twinkle little star' song went.

(Wow, there are so many! I never dreamed there would be so many!)

In complete awe she leaned against the window, staring at them, not reverting her eyes away, finally prying herself away, she turned towards the door, should she dare take a look, if there was anything that could harm her, Raph wouldn't have brought her here.

It was decided, she was going to take a look around, worse case scenario, she could always scream, even with his heavy snoring, he should still be able to hear her, though it might give him a heart attack.

Smirking on the thought, she headed towards the door, hoping it didn't result to that, for she would feel awful, waking him up in such a way.

Turning the door knob, she opened it a bit, the door ajar she looked through it to see if it was indeed safe, nothing alarming happened, taking a breath she opened it wide leaving the room, shutting the door behind her.

Sasha found herself in what looked like a hallway, on one side was a bunch of doors and the far end was another door. To her other side was a set of stairs leading down, beside the stairs was a railing that overlooked what seemed to be a living room, with a fireplace that was going.

Making her way down the stairs, the living room had two couches, the fireplace indeed had a fire going within it, a small fire though, that seemed it was fighting to keep burning, noticing the pile of wood beside it, she took a piece placing it in the fireplace.

(I think that would do…)

Observing it, the log caught on fire quiet quickly, spreading its heat into the cool room, rubbing her hands to bring warmth to them, she walked towards an archway that led to a kitchen.

It was like any other kitchen, there was a stove, fridge and on the table in the middle of the room, was a piece of paper, folded with Raph's name on it.

(I wonder what it says.)

Making sure she was alone and Raph wasn't behind her, she looked over her shoulder, she was alone, feeling a bit guilty she opened it up, a quick peek won't hurt.

'_Raph the items for breakfast are in the fridge, the bread is in the bread box. Don't burn it! Mikey. P.S. Sasha if you're reading this, it means the lazy ass is still sleeping. If you want to make breakfast, go ahead, you probably would do a better job than Raphie! :) Oh, just to let you know, no we are not there, only you and Raph, have fun!'_

(We are alone? Damn it Mikey, you could at least tell me where here is…)

Sighing, she put the note down, debating if she should make breakfast, she wasn't particularly fond with burnt food and Mikey did give her some cooking lessons, which in turn she might do a better job than Raph.

But what was for breakfast? Opening the fridge there was a carton of eggs and a package of bacon.

Taking them out she looked about for the tools she would need to get this going.

* * *

(Raph POV)

Bacon, the one smell that made his mouth drool, lifting his beak he sniffed the air, like in a trance he leaned forward, it smelled so good.

Only inches away, oh how he wanted to sink his teeth into a juicy piece of…

_**Smack!**_

Shaken, stunned, Raph's eyes sprung open, as a painful reminder that he was lying on the sofa, now on the floor, with his beak throbbing in pain, as it made contact with the ground, when he fell.

Groaning loudly, he rub his poor beak, then finally tried to get out of the web of blanket that wrapped around him, that he wasn't sure how it got on him in the first place, didn't he fall asleep without a blanket for he was to exhausted to go out of his way, looking for one?

"Damn it, that hurt, huh where is Sasha?" untangled, he slowly got to his feet looking over towards the empty bed he placed Sasha last night in.

Being late, last night, he didn't bother waking her up, as they arrived at their destination, figuring it was best just to leave her be, he carried her in taking her winter gear off and laying her in bed.

On the fact she didn't know where he was bringing her, Raph considered it was the best choice for him to sleep in her room for the night so she didn't freak out in the morning if she found herself alone in a strange place.

His muscles ache from the sofa, he was better off sleeping on the floor, stretching to get the kinks out, he grabbed his bandana, he didn't bother putting any his gear on, he will not be needing it and he wanted to show Sasha this was a safe place.

Leaving the room, the sweet smell of bacon yet again caught his beak, remembering that it was that smell that awakened him.

A bit annoyed that she got up before him and was doing what he planned to do for her, he pushed it away, as he entered the kitchen.

Sasha didn't notice him since she was busy working the eggs, biting his lip, he fought the urge to go behind her and wrap his arms around her.

(… What am I thinking? I can't do that to her… wish I could…)

Taking in some deep breaths, he tried to find something to get his mind off of the feelings that were building within.

Noticing the paper on the table with his name on it, taking a quick look over what was written, he narrowed his eyes, as if Mikey would think he would fuck up the breakfast, he wouldn't burn it, he wasn't Donnie, who can burn water, leaving an impossible to clean, black pot behind.

Grumbling under his breath, he crumpled the paper, "Stupid Mikey…" he huffed under his breath.

A giggle came behind him, as he realized Sasha finally noticed him, with a shrug, he threw the paper in the garbage, "Well, sorry about that, I was going to make breakfast."

"It's ok Raph, I have it covered, can you get the plates and forks? I don't have a clue where they are."

Nodding Raph gather two plates and forks for her, placing them on the table, while Sasha filled them up with eggs, bacon and toast.

Sitting down both started to eat, taking a bite, Raph was surprised how good it was, she did a great job, eating all that was on his plate, his stomach was happy.

Raph could feel a pair of wondering eyes on him, he knew she had questions and what he would answer to them, depend on how much he wished her to find out.

"We are at the farm that Casey's family owns," Raph answered the first question he knew she was going to ask him.

Looking around, she nodded, "So this is what this place looks like… So why are we here? Mikey wrote in his letter that he isn't here or your brothers," Sasha leaned forward crossing her arms under her, staring at Raph.

A small smile flashed on his face, "You'll see."

Pouting Sasha leaned back not to happy with that answer, but Raph was, he loved this, the way she sulked, the way it drove her nuts not knowing fully what he was up too.

Stretching Raph took his plate, placing it in the sink heading for the living room to put some more wood in the fireplace, he didn't want it to get too cold in there, then it has already had.

Turning around Sasha was leaning against the door frame watching him contently, he couldn't help but be amused, considering he was having a lot fun with this, he made the decision to play this out more.

"Put your winter gear on, all of it, it's cold out there," Raph informed Sasha, as he did the same, putting on his winter coat and even a pair of pants himself.

Sasha studied him with wondering eyes, yet did what he asked of her.

Not saying another word he left the house into the cold winter air, it was calm outside and by now the sun was out, although it was bright there was no warmth from it, shivering a bit he didn't particularly enjoy winter only tolerated it.

Waiting, Raph looked around; it must have snowed last night after he had arrived to the house, for his footsteps and even the car tracks were covered by a new thick layer of snow.

"Where are we going?" Sasha asked him, closing the door behind her, shivering a bit when the cold air hit her.

"You'll see," he answered her again with a grin, her expression was priceless.

Annoyed, she glared at him, "You're not going to answer me other than that, are you?"

Raph smiled more, sighing Sasha shook her head, then was caught by surprise by Raph.

He held his hand out to her, "Do you trust me?"

(Please say yes.)

Tilting her head, she looked at Raph's hand, then him, what an odd question for him to ask her, "Of course I do, why would you…!"

Before she could say another word Raph picked her up, placing her gently onto his shell so he was giving her a piggy back ride, then suddenly bolted towards the barn, passing it heading for the tree line.

* * *

(Sasha POV)

Raph was fast, as the snow flew into the air behind him, Sasha could only hold on, for Raph wouldn't say a word, he seemed focused on where he was going and his footing.

Still in wonder, she didn't pry, she did trust him, and to show it she wasn't going to question him.

Holding tight, but not too tight, she leaned her head down, to avoid getting snow in her face, she could see the smile on his face, she could see the enjoyment he was having her in his mercy, she didn't mind, she felt safe and there was something else, she could smell him.

(… He really smells good…)

Oddly, she never noticed this from him before, well not in this manner, she did recognize Raph scent, but she never really gave it any real thought to it.

In reality she hasn't been this close to him for such a long period of time, to ever truly enjoy his scent, as she was doing at that moment.

Was it wrong for her to do this, was it perverted? She remembered Donnie mentioning something on the line about how she might have some new sensations when it comes to her senses, that she didn't have when she was human.

Something like smell would be a key one, even sounds, though she wasn't sure what he meant by sounds, though, but she started to understand the smell, certain things made her feel differently, a perfect example here was Raph, she felt like blushing just by the smell of him alone.

Closing her eyes, she gave in enjoying it, this little moment, his scent, feeling him under her arms, she wished deep inside this was more, they were more than friends… But who is she fooling, why would Raph want to be with her, someone so lost and damage as her?

(If I was still human this would be different…)

Suddenly Raph stopped in his tracks, opening her eyes, they were in front of a cave, not sure what to think, she held onto Raph tighter, she felt uneasy, she didn't like the looks of it, and why would he bring her to a cave?

Raph, indicating that she was best to walk here on out, Sasha leaped off Raph's shell landing onto the snowy ground still unsure what was going on, she held onto his arm, refusing to let go.

"Don't worry… If it does make you feel better, then keep holding my arm, but Sasha I promise you there is nothing to fear. I will never let anything happen to you," placing his hand on top of hers, as a source of comfort he left it there, walking forward into the cave.

The cave was dark, yet not damp luckily, but it was quite oddly warm, comforting, it didn't give any bad vibes, yet the opposite.

Letting Raph to lead her, Sasha didn't say a word, she knew what the answer would be for him, he was being all mysterious, and part of her hated it, but the other half was excited, this was kind of fun.

Following the long straight path, they came to what seemed to be the end of the cave, unsure why would Raph would bring her to a dead end cave to nothing out of the ordinary, she watched him carefully, he was still not letting on what was going on.

"Sasha I will need my arm, you just stand there," Raph gently made her let go of him, as he headed towards the wall in front of him, looking for something.

"… Oh come on, where is it?" Raph huffed a bit frustrated and annoyed.

Suddenly he placed his hand on part of the wall, then like magic the wall started to glow with symbols and lines, startled Sasha reacted by stepping back, unsure what was happening.

(What!? What is going on?!)

Uneasy, she took more steps back as her fear of the unknown took over her, realizing how she was reacting Raph went to her quickly going in front of her taking her hand.

"Hey, it's ok, sorry, maybe I should have warned you first," Raph felt bad, he didn't mean to scare her.

"What… what is going on, why is the wall doing that?" Sasha managed to get out, she wasn't sure if she was more scared or curious.

"A doorway," Raph answered as he tried to find the right words before he scared the poor turtle half to death and losing any chance he had to get her to finally open up to him.

"A doorway to what!" panicking, Sasha bit her lip, this felt too surreal, what was going on, why was there this door in the middle of nowhere, how can it even be there or existed in the first place?

"Do you trust me?" Raph could only ask, giving his hand to her once more, he looked concerned about what kind of answer she would give him.

(…)

Looking at his hand, she hesitated at first, what was in front of her she couldn't figure it out, she wanted to see what was on the other side, yet she was scared.

Shaking, she gave him her hand, she wasn't sure if this was the right idea, but she had to trust him, for he was the only thing she had left and if she lost him, she would be alone.

Bringing her close to him, he held her; she could feel the warmth from his body, as she was surprised by him giving her a kiss on the forehead, "Thank you. I know this isn't easy to accept like many things in your life, but hearing you truly trust me even now of all times, means a lot. I promise Sasha you're going to love this."

With that, he let her go, but not her hand as he led her into the doorway.


	3. Chapter 3

**TMNT: Changes **

**An OC x Raph Fan Fic**

**Part 3 of 3 (Finish)**

* * *

(Sasha POV)

A soothing bright, warm light engulfed her entire body, she felt like a feather, free in a warm spring breeze.

She couldn't see anything other then the light itself, but she did not threat, even though she couldn't see Raph, she could still feel his hand, the one thing that made her fear stay back in its cage.

She had to admit though this felt odd, she enjoyed the serenity it brought her, as quickly as the light came the sooner it left.

Feeling herself finally standing on something solid again, her eyes adjusted to her new surroundings, eyes widen in complete disbelief, she didn't have the faintest idea where she was this time, or what she was seeing was even possible, this place was the most foreign thing, she has ever witnessed.

It looked like she was in some kind of garden, there were plants everywhere, plants she had no clue what they were, or the fact they were plants at all, but she had to admit they were very beautiful, with their interesting color combinations, sizes and shapes.

Looking over her shoulder, behind her was some kind of stone archway that led only to a wall.

Did they enter from there?

(What is this place? It's so, so... I don't know what to call it.)

Overwhelmed, looking up, she could see windows or was this some kind of dome?

Either way, she could see billions among billions of stars and color clouds, it was breathtaking, where they in space?

Theories amongst theories flashed in her head, her imagination took flight, she started to wonder if she was sleeping, this can't be real, could it?

"Welcome to the garden," Raph smiled at her, letting go her hand so he can take his winter gear off, following his example, she did the same, as Raph took it, hanging it on some coat rack that was made out of plant vines.

"The garden?" she asked, looking around more, lost for words to even describe her surroundings or find the words to express how she was feeling at the moment to him.

She still couldn't believe this was happening, she must be dreaming or the cave had some hallucinogenic properties that could explain this.

"Yes, its called the Garden, I know what you're thinking… no, I didn't make it up, or took it from some silly novel. The caretaker of this place calls it that."

"Um… ok, caretaker, garden… Raph, I'm a bit confused," Sasha admitted, biting her lower lip, she started to feel a bit scared, she feared she was losing it.

Scratching his head Raph chuckled, then stopped, realizing how Sasha was reacting, taking a breath, he felt lost himself "Sorry, I guess I need to explain a bit more, well rrr… damn it I should have got Donnie to give you this explanation before hand."

Raph placed his hand onto his chin, thinking hard, it was obvious he knew the answer to her question, but was having a hard time finding the words, she didn't care what the answer was as long as he told her something, anything that would put the fear of her going crazy to rest.

Sasha placed her hand onto his shoulder to encourage him to at least try, "Take your time, you don't have to get all mumble jumble with me, and I think you would do a better job than Donnie, half the time I think he speaks another language."

Chuckling, he nodded in agreement, "Yeah, you have a point, well we are in another dimension, please say you understand what a dimension is, considering there is no way in hell I can explain it, I just accept it…"

Star struck on the word, she stared at him.

(Dimension? We are in another dimension, is that even possible?! There is other Dimensions!)

"I understand what it is… but how, I didn't know that this was even possible, I thought that was something that exists in novels and movies…" taking another look around she could see that this place could be, but the question was how?

Raph shrugged, "They are real, been in a couple of them myself in the past, but how it works don't ask, I can't answer that. All I know is that to get to this place you have to enter through a door like the one we did. That said, there are more doors I remember, and the rules are, you exit the way you came in."

"So when we leave we will be in the cave again?"

"Yep, that's what I remember; anyways do you want to look around. The caretaker owed one to me and my brothers and gave me permission to use the place for the day without worrying about other visitors," Raph gave out his hand.

"Ok…" Sasha looked at his hand, deep down, she started to feel a bit better, she didn't feel like she has lost her marbles now, as well she knew Raph would never put her in danger, giving him her hand, he started to give her a tour of the garden.

The place was breathtaking, huge, it was like an amusement park that was just gardens of everything imaginable, some look like they were picked out of a fantasy book.

There were flowers, trees, plants of all shapes and sizes, color, unbelievable colors, some she never thought would ever exist, she saw purple trees with sky blue leaves, she saw flowers, bigger than her, she was even kissed on the cheek by a flower which made her jump into the air, landing into Raph's arms.

In a burst of laughter, he wouldn't stop teasing her on it, as she turned red, huffing, crossing her arms walking away from him for being an ass.

* * *

(Raph POV)

Raph watched the frustrated female turtle walking away from him, he tried to hold back his laughter, her face, the expression on her it was more than he could bear.

She acted like the flower was going to eat her, didn't she read the sign 'Kissing Soysla' considering it explained the name and what it did.

He really wished he owned a camera, something that would have captured that moment.

Shaking his head, he realized Sasha was a little ways ahead of him, taking a step forward a whisper came from within the flowers, hiding among them.

"Raph…" the voice called lowly not to be overheard.

"Damn it, Donnie what are you doing… You know that flower is kissing your…"

Donnie narrowed his eyes, "Don't you dare, that's all I have to say, just let me know if she is out of earshot!" the brother was annoyed by the flowers that took a liking to him.

"Yeah," Raph smirked, as Donnie rushed out of the flowers pointing to them to cut it out.

"So how is it going?" Donnie asked before Raph could say something about the flowers more just to tease him.

"She took the dimension thing ok. I think she is feeling better…" Raph looked at the direction that Sasha disappeared too.

"She seemed happier, so did she… you know, open up?" Donnie stepped on the other side of Raph to prevent the flowers from continuing to pursue him.

Raph's eyes became heavy, letting out a sigh, he shook his head, "No… Donnie what if she doesn't, you have noticed it, right? How she has been acting… I… What if she doesn't finally open up? You said it seems like its eating at her, what if it consumes her… I don't want to lose her Donnie…"

Seeing his brother in such dismay Donnie only could put his hand on his shoulder, "She will, she trusts you, she cares about you a lot. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to notice that. Cheer up if you act depressed, it will only make her build that wall thicker and higher. Show her a good time, let her know you're there, that's all you can do, trust me Raph she will let you in, you're not going to lose her."

"Thanks Donnie… By the way if you dare tell anyone about this conversation I will kick your ass!" Raph smiled slyly, like hell he wanted his other brothers know about this tender moment with Donnie, they would tease him later.

Lightly chuckling scratching his cheek Donnie turned red and white at the same time, "Don't worry, wouldn't dare to think it, anyways, there is some sights ahead. Bring her the long way to the destination, I will have my part done and be out of here before she realized I am about."

Nodding, Raph was relieved to hear everything was still on schedule, "Good, try not to be seen or go where we are, and if you value your life, no spying on us, you hear me?" Raph threaten, but he knew Donnie wouldn't, yet he had to make sure the younger brother knew he was serious about this.

"Ok, ok, better catch up to her. Oh Tiger Lilies, the ones I showed you don't forget!" Donnie told Raph before taking a gulp venturing back into the kissing flowers.

"Tiger Lilies got it," Raph reminded himself running forward to find Sasha.

* * *

(Sasha POV)

A bit annoyed by the fact Raph thought it was funny that a flower, yes a flower, kissed her, kiss, not touch her because there was some wind.

No, actually moved on its own free will, bending over kissing her on the cheek.

Throwing her arms in the air, she couldn't believe it, a flower kissed her!

(What next a plant will run around like some dog, then what? Jump onto me and start licking my face?!)

Shivering, that was an odd image that came to mind, she pushed it away, still a bit freaked out she looked around noticing she was alone.

Oddly, she didn't feel scared though, this place had an atmosphere to it, a calmer one, peaceful actually, the kissing flower just weird her out not really scared her.

Debating if she should turn around and find out where Raph got to; a sound of charms rang into her ears.

Curiosity got its hands on her, forcing her to look over towards an area that was filled with thick vines, getting close to them, they started to part ways making a path.

(Interesting… should I enter? Raph said this place is safe and the garden will never harm anyone.)

Taking a breath, she managed to muster her courage, taking a step forward following the path before her.

The smell of flowers filled the path, looking up, she could see fragments of light trying to pierce through the vines, as they reflected off see through color leaves.

It was amazing, it was like the vines above her were giving her a light show, smiling, she looked forward as she could see the end, wondering what was ahead, she couldn't hold it back, she started to run for the end.

The path ended at some arch, light blinded her when she came out of the pathway, as the sight, smell and sounds came at her all at once.

The sweet smell of water, mixed with water lilies filled her beak, the warm rays of light touch her skin lightly, making her feel like someone wrapped her in a warm soft blanket.

There were sounds of water falling and pleasant charms rang within the background.

Before her, was a pond, that had a waterfall casting a colorful rainbow, beside the pond was a cherry blossom tree that was in full bloomed, but instead the flowers being white or pink, it was bright yellow.

Its peddles scattered about falling off the tree flying within the windless air, opening up her hands some fell into her hand, feeling them, they were soft, silky, and smelled like a mix of different flowers mixed into one.

No words could describe the smell.

Walking towards the pond, Sasha kneeled on top of the big rock beside it, looking within its water as the sun warmed up her shell, instantly she had a chirp escaped her.

Almost jumping out of her shell, it scared her.

(Did I make that sound?)

First time ever making such a sound, she wasn't sure what to think of it.

Sure, she has heard the guys make a similar sound at times, very rarely and they normally turn red when it happened, like they didn't mean to do it and they were embarrassed in doing so.

Taking a breath, she leaned over again, the sun felt so relaxing, as she laid her plastron against the rock, staring at the water.

(.mmmmmm…)

She was enjoying this, the feeling, then it hit her, was she basking? She remembered reading about turtles basking, but was she doing it?

Yet another thing the guys never mention to her, maybe that is part of the reason she has been having a hard time with her new body.

She doesn't know what to expect out of it, she tries to bury the feeling she has, the instincts, thinking she shouldn't be acting like that, yet it makes her feel wrong about herself, confused on how she should act and be.

Everything inside was confusing, she didn't know where to start or to think…

Sighing, she placed her hand into the cool water, noticing how her body reacted to having her shell in the sun and her hand in cold water, it was like she felt balanced in a way.

Letting out another chirp, she didn't care this time around, letting it out, hearing it, she felt happy, it was like laughing or smiling, it was the same feeling but a bit different in a way.

Closing her eyes, she stayed in her position.

Then suddenly something brushed her hand, she didn't jump or got scared, for a smell, a familiar one caught her beak, opening her eyes, there in the water was this little cute turtle, with a blue shell that shimmer in the light.

The aroma was another turtle, she actually knew just by its smell that a turtle was there.

Stroking her finger against the little reptile's face, it chirped, brushing its face against her hand more wagging its tail in delight.

With a giggle Sasha, smiled at it, "Aren't you a cute one."

"They are," a voice came from her right; startled she jumped to her feet, turning around to meet face to face with what seemed to be a woman.

She looked like a plant, tall and slender with flowery clothing, a flowing dress that dragged onto the ground, her face was kind and she smiled at Sasha, "Don't threat little turtle; I do apologize for scaring you. I am Ember the caretaker of the garden; you must be the friend that Raphael brought here. It is a pleasure in meeting you," Ember bowed deeply.

Unsure what to say, Sasha didn't move or say a peep, she was weary, she didn't like strangers, especially when she was alone.

Noticing her uneasiness Ember's eyes sadden, "I see… My apologies, I will inform Raphael that you're here, it was nice meeting you."

With that Ember turned around to leave.

(…That was rude of me…)

Biting her lip Sasha took a breath, moving past her comfort zone, "What kind of turtle is he or she?"

Stopping Ember turned around smiling, "They are Quilita Turtles, a rare species that is extinct other than here. It is said they don't show themselves to anyone, and it's rare they do. It's good luck to have a Quilita Turtle take affection to you. You're a lucky turtle; they must see something special about you."

Sasha, looked over towards the pond just realizing the one that she met wasn't the only one, since there were now others swimming around, basking in the sun.

Rubbing her arm, she didn't agree with Ember, on what she said.

(There is nothing special about me…)

"Well, little turtle, if that is all, I have other duties to do, I will inform Raphael." Ember left Sasha alone with her thoughts.

Standing there, Sasha decided she was best to stay put until Raph finds her, no point wandering around and she really wanted to stay in this spot longer, it was a place she felt her most calmest.

Going back to the rock, she watched the turtles as many climbed the rock to greet her, it was interesting how they flocked to her, she couldn't hold her giggles and smiles as he rubbed against her hands, chirping.

Some even started to do tricks like they were trying to entertain her, she never heard turtles act in this manner, then again she has never seen a blue shell turtle's either.

Clapping, she applauded the turtles that did tricks, as she did they chirped and wagged their tails, happy that she like their performance.

"Wow," Raph stood at the archway amazed on the sight that was in front of him.

As he finished his 'wow' all the turtles suddenly ran for the hills disappearing within the falls.

Frustrated Raph just stared, "Come on really? They are all happy around you and when I come the rush away like I'm some scary monster. Damn it, I am a turtle too, you know."

Raph pouted, all of a sudden, Sasha burst into laughter almost rolling off the rock, holding her sides that felt like there were splitting into two.

She could feel the glare off Raph that only made her laughing fit worsen as her eyes tear up.

"Oh, you think that is funny do you!" Raph loomed over her, then went for her sides between the slits of her plastron tickling her, she shrieked in protest, crying and laughing.

"Stop it!" she whimpered, kicking her legs trying to get out of his hold, laughing away.

"Never!" Raph roared laughing too.

"Oh… Please stop, I am going to pee myself," Sasha screamed, kicking hard, actually getting Raph in the plastron, the impact was so hard he flung back landing smaking to the ground hard onto his shell.

Silence took her, as she stared in horror, she didn't mean to hit him that hard, she didn't know she could, mortified, Sasha stared at him more, he didn't move he just laid there.

Getting to her feet quickly she rushed to him.

(Oh no, did I hurt him? Can I even really hurt him?)

Panicking, she reached him standing beside him, before she could say a thing, Raph sprung up wrapping his arms around her, as she fell forward.

In seconds Raph managed to pull her down, only to find himself on top of her as she stared at him, not scared, but very surprised.

(…)

Blushing, she looked into his golden rod eyes, vibrant and pure.

Raph just realizing what he has just done, in the mist of playing around Raph didn't realized what position he just got himself into, he went completely red.

Speechless they stared at each other, which felt like hours, then Raph did something unexpected, slowly he leaned forward placing his lips against hers.

Sasha's face turned red, as she felt everything inside her went off like fireworks, was this really happening, did Raph just kiss her, was he still kissing her!

(um um um um um…. Oh my god, Oh my god… ok get a hold of yourself… don't fall apart now, he is just kissing you… He is kissing me… oh my god, oh my god…)

Frantic Sasha was at a lost, she didn't know what to do then something deep inside her came up to the surface, as she stopped Raph from what he was doing, her eyes was full of tears, pushing him off of her.

Crying Sasha got to her feet, this was too soon, she wanted him, but, shaking her head, she couldn't hold back the things that strangled her, hung her up, not letting her go.

Not saying a word she ran, not turning around.

(I'm sorry…)

* * *

(Raph POV)

Raph sat there on the ground, stunned, what was he thinking, to make a move like that, now he has upset her.

(DAMN IT, I CAN BE SUCH AN IDOT…)

Scrambling to his feet, Raph had to catch up to her, tell her he was sorry, that he didn't mean it… well he did mean to kiss her, he got all caught up in the moment he just reacted before thinking.

Which wasn't abnormal for him, but still this wasn't one of those times he can act like an idiot, she was fragile and he could have broken her.

Shaking his head, he wanted to punch something, anything to put his frustration into, breathing deeply he tried every technique to calm himself down, to cage his anger, to make him think clearly.

Bull rushing into this would only make things worse.

Running down a path, he couldn't see her.

(Shit she is fast…)

Then suddenly he stopped, as he noticed something in one of the flowerbeds as Donnie voice rang in his head, "Don't forget about the Tiger Lilies."

There in the masses of flowers was one Tiger Lily, Donnie making sure Raph knew what they look like, showed him images drilling them into Raph's head what they look like and what they mean.

Lilies mean beauty and tiger lilies mean purity, but Donnie did mention they can symbolize 'troubled times can be overcome and peace can be found', though usually associated with tattoos, it can be thought the same when receiving one, and Donnie told him Sasha does see these flowers in this manner, which is the only thing that mattered.

Carefully navigating into the flowerbed, he reached it taking the flower in hand, he hoped this would help, if he can't find the words, or the ones he does use don't work, maybe this will get his point across.

(I really hope this works; I'm running out of options…)

* * *

(Sasha POV)

Upset, frustrated Sasha ran, she didn't care where she was going, she felt like a moron for doing that to Raph, what was she thinking.

Then the feelings, the doubt that locked around her heart, it was pushing her into the darkness of her own doubts and insecurity.

She didn't know what was with her, yet in the back of her mind, she knew, she knew if she was this broken, she shouldn't dare to be with him, she didn't deserve him.

Crying, she tripped over her own feet, wiping out onto the ground, lying there she stared at it, what was she to do?

(…)

Slowly getting up she sat on her knees, placing her palms into her lap, looking at the ground not moving, not saying a whisper, just staring.

What was she to do? The thoughts raced in her head, she could feel the weight of them pushing down onto her shell, she wanted to scream, she wanted to wake up in her bed, safe and sound.

She wanted this nightmare, this constant teasing to be over with, she wanted her body to be normal, she wanted to be a normal human again; she felt like a freak, she was wrong, everything in her was wrong.

Grinding her teeth, she couldn't hold it back, as she screamed out loud, louder than she did in the shower, as birds responded flocking away from their branches.

She screamed her frustrations out, but knew all too well they would come back, knew all to well they will never go away, always returning to her.

Tears covered her eyes, as they dripped onto her hands, closing her eyes, she stopped her scream, holding her breath as long as she could.

Then suddenly she felt something on her hand, slowly opening her eyes, there it was, an orange flower with black spots on it, a Tiger Lily, she only seen it in books, but recognized the smell anywhere.

Flashes of her past filled her head, of her mother, on the day she went to central park, the day her mother placed this flower in her hand, telling her its name as Sasha felt its petals and inhaled its aroma.

Her mother told her what it looked like and said it was beautiful as her, her miracle, her precious daughter.

Losing it, Sasha balled pressing the flower into her plastron tilting forward, letting all her tears out.

She could feel a set of arms wrap around her, giving into them, she let him pull her back into him as she continued to cry, digging her face into his arm, Raph stroked her head, not saying a word letting her cry.

"I'm so messed up…" Sasha started, "I'm nothing, I have nothing anymore, I wanted to make her proud of me, there were plans for me to go to college. I finally had a destination. All my life, nothing was constant other then my loneliness, there was nothing for me to look forward too. I was going to change all that… I had the opportunity to be something, to make her happy. Once in my life I was finally going to prove I am not useless, that because I was blind, didn't mean I couldn't be someone… then this happened… this…. I am back to square one… nothing is constant… I failed, I'm nothing…"

Sasha held onto Raph's arm harder as her failure, her fears, her past, her destroyed future, all her doubts, held onto her tightly choking the life out of her.

"You're wrong…" Raph broke through her depression, her dark cloud that hung over her head.

"You hear me, you're wrong! You do have a future, what I don't know, but does it matter? Do you think your mother only will be proud of you, if you went to college? Do you really think your mother would only be proud of you if you got some career? No!... I am no parent, but I do have a father, that taught me he was proud of who I became, not what I could be in society. Your kind, your smart, your creative, you care about people, you don't' judge others, you became a friend to a mutant and didn't care. You treated me no different than any other human. I was no monster to you, no demon that was going to hurt you, you trusted me! That's, who you are, I know without a shadow of a doubt, your mother would be proud of you! You're better than most people, you're exactly the same person you described your mother to be! So what you're a turtle, so what you can't live a human life!? You do have one constant thing Sasha, one thing that will never change regardless if your life, your world does. ME! I will never leave you; I will never give you up. You know why?" Raph tilted her head gently up towards him so he can have eye contact with her.

Her tears ran, she looked upon him, his words did ring true, but her doubt wouldn't let go of her, her misery wouldn't fuck off.

Biting his lower lip, his eyes blazed, "I LOVE YOU!"

Sasha body shuddered on those words, as she stared into his eyes, he was serious, there was no hesitation, no doubt in his voice, his eyes remain strong, supporting those words.

Her lips trembled, her heart raced, as more tears filled her eyes, suddenly she flung into his arms, wrapping them around his neck, burying her face into his neck, chirping sadly, letting everything in her out into the open.

This chirp she made was different then the one she did on the rock, she didn't stop them, she wanted to make them to express herself, she didn't have words, she felt confused, yet holding him helped, his words helped.

Then she heard a sound from him, an answer to her chirps, he chirped to her, the sound was comforting, soothing like he could feel her pain, he understood her fully.

Something about this, something about the sounds they made was on a level she never knew existed or thought there was such a thing.

Slowly she started to understand what Donnie was getting at, about certain sounds would make her experience thing differently then when she was human.

Letting go of him she leaned back to see his face, in shock Raph was crying, she has never seen him cry before or shed a tear.

Placing her hand onto his face, wiping away his tears, he smiled sweetly to her.

Smiling back, her hand trailed down towards his mouth feeling it, like the first times she felt his face, Raph pulled off his bandana, wrapping it around his neck, letting her see his face fully, letting her to feel it, is she wished to.

Taking that invite, she did, feeling the cheek bone, the eyebrows, his chin, then she braved it, leaning towards him, she felt her lips against his.

Noticing how they felt, how they tasted, how they made her feel, closing her eyes, she could smell him, his aroma, that sweet smell that made him, him.

Raph didn't move, letting her take her own steps, fighting the urge to just grab her and hold her tightly.

Ending her kiss she leaned back looking into his eyes, he was being very patience with her, he was being considerate, he was staring at her, and she could see what his eyes were telling her.

"Raph, I love you too," Sasha finally replied to his confession a second ago, she wanted to say it right away, but she needed to understand her feelings and sort them out.

Placing his hand on her cheek, he rubbed it with his thumb, "Thank you, Sasha, Thank you for trusting me."

Locking lips again, Raph, gently lowered her to the ground, hovering over her.

"Raph, I'm sorry about not opening up to you… I just… Now on I will not hold anything back, even if it's hard for me to say it, I will be open with you. I trust you, I know I still have things to figure out, but now I understand I'm not alone… Thank you Raph..." Sasha licked Raph on the cheek, not sure why she did it, but it felt kind of fun and an appropriate gesture.

Smiling widely Raph enjoyed it, purring, which made Sasha start to laugh, Raph smiled purring louder throwing in some chirps, making her fidget under him, knowing all too well what he was making her feel at the moment.

Then he jumped to his feet with a big grin, disappointed Sasha stared at him in disbelief, pouting, "I hate you," she snarled at him.

Grinning more, Raph chuckled, "I know, but I'm getting really hungry and our food is getting cold, then… Let's say I have a big surprise for you later, you just have to wait until after lunch," with that he started to walk away.

Lying on the ground Sasha sighed; trying to calm her hormones that Raph evilly triggered, then left her high and dry, mumbling to herself she got to her feet, eyeing Raph.

(Well, now, if he wants to play that game, then fine! He is going to regret that later.)

Sasha smiled devilishly; she was going to make him pay for this.

Catching up to Raph, Sasha grabbed his hand as he looked at her then kissed her on the cheek, smiling, for the first time Sasha felt happy, really happy.

Finally opening up to him, made her feel calm, secure, she felt that the heavy cloud that has been looming over her for some time, finally disappeared, never to return again.

As long as Raph was by her side, she was going to be fine.

Sometimes changes are a good thing, especially when you have a love one to help you, when you need it

FIN.


End file.
